life changes

Whirlwind {Thoughts From Me}

September 4, 2017 by Dana

While others have been recovering from the Hurricane in Texas and preparing for Irma to choose her path, we’ve been dealing with our personal whirlwind in life. Sometimes the unexpected happens and all you can do is follow God’s direction to carry you through. We have chosen to let him lead though we have no idea what to expect.

Back in June, Don lost his main job and began working on his own completely. He was already subcontracted but that ended so we took on our own odd jobs just to pay the bills. Unfortunately, this just wasn’t enough.

So then out of the blue, Don got a job offer elsewhere in the world. We weren’t sure this was right at first so we held off but in the end it became our only option. God was pressing us to move on.

At this same time, our landlords decided to not renew our lease. They knew we were struggling but were not understanding. So they terminated the lease on August 11, leaving us until August 31 to find a home and move. Though we didn’t know what to do, in the end this is a blessing in disguise. As we moved out we found black mold throughout the house, despite serious efforts on our part to clean it and remove it. We also found that the floor underneath Emmalee’s bed was collapsing from the dampness let behind after Hurricane Matthew last year.

There were other issues: backed up septic since the Hurricane as well, illegal drain set up for my washer, a window that was never repaired, roof issues and gutters that were never repaired. Then there was also the local bar at their house that opened up every weekend and holiday. Needless to say, we are thankful we are no longer living there.

None of these changes have been expected. At this time, we will not be sharing where we currently are located but it’s a huge life change and somewhere we never expected to be. However, we feel God has brought us here and we know that he has a plan for us and our futures. We will keep following him to see where we are led and will pray for the best as we go.

Please keep us in your prayers as well. We appreciate you all.

What It All Meant {Thoughts From Me}

May 22, 2017 by Dana

Soon I’m going to take the big step to move us over to WordPress and off this current format for blogging, so this past week, I’ve been going through old posts and making a few changes that will make this easier for me. I’ve also been correcting a few things I didn’t know I had been doing wrong with my coding. (Blogging is a daily learning experience.) It’s a lot but it will be well worth it in the end.

Going through old posts means taking a step back into the past. This hasn’t been easy. There are things I wish I could erase. There are things I have deleted just because I don’t want to be reminded they happened even with this blog. Nothing I’m ashamed of, just things it’s time to let go of. I know I can never change the past, and I never would because our past is what makes us who we are today.

I have deleted a few irrelevant posts. I’m not sure what I was thinking when I wrote those. They were just filling space.

I also took notice that my life was going in a certain direction back then but somewhere I got off that track. It’s a road I’d like to find again, and I will in time. See, life sometimes hurts so much that you lose yourself and you become someone who covers the pain with a fake smile or a positive word that deep down doesn’t mean a thing. Sometimes the abuse is so hard that you want to pretend it just doesn’t exist, so you do pretend and you paint a picture that all is right with the world, even when it isn’t.

I took notice that my ex was rarely mentioned in my previous posts. He was in my day to day life and frequently mentioned on my social media while we were together but not here. He didn’t want to be part of my life and he let me know it so often that I just left him out as much as I could. I wanted him but he never wanted me and honestly, I’m okay with that now.

I see now that we were not right for each other and God has blessed me more than I could ever have imagined with my husband, Don and our beautiful family. I see now that God had a bigger and better plan for me. The experience with my ex was something that was forced and something that was unwanted by one side but it was an experience I learned greatly from and one I can go forth and share my pain with others like me who need someone to understand. Having Don in my life gives me hope and strength and love where once their was none.

My blog used to be Christ centered, and though God is still here in my writing, I wish to find Him again, to share encouragement and love, to spread his Truth through my own testimony for God gave me a great one to share. I wish to help others, to inspire them, to show them that a better life is ahead, not to give up and to fight for what their heart desires, for it will come. With God all things are possible and our dreams will come true.

So here I am, finding my way again, working on bigger things that will come about in time.

Until then…

Dana

Joy to Come {Thoughts From Me}

August 8, 2012 by Dana

Lately I’m feeling stuck in a serious rut. I know the weeks are flying by for Jackson’s arrival. I have so much to do but yet I feel like I’m getting no where. I search for the “what’s next” stages but find nothing.

We have three weeks until baby Jackson is born. I haven’t gotten anything of his ready except to say that he has plenty of clothes. I have some washes to use on him. I have no diapers for his tiny little bottom yet though. No wipes to clean him with. And so much I still have to do.

I’m nervous and scared but trying to remain calm. In three weeks I have surgery to give birth to my last darling baby, my sweet baby boy. It cannot come fast enough and yet it’s coming way to fast for me.

I’m ready for it all to be overwith and at the same time I’m so not ready. Jackson will be my last baby. My last baby to carry beneath my heart. The last baby I feel roll and tumble and kick inside my belly. The last one to hear my heartbeat from the inside.

I know it’s time to give up birthing babies. I have discussed this with God. I have felt him agree with me. Yet, it makes me sad to know it’s all over. It makes me sad to know it can’t go on and on. It makes me sad to know there will never be another baby I carry and feel, to hold and love after Jackson.

Yet I do know it’s time. My health cannot withstand pregnancy again. I’m getting to old to feel sick like I have this time around. I want to spend time with my children, to love and watch them grow without feeling like I am neglecting them for the morning sickness and tiredness of pregnancy. I want to enjoy the days I’m blessed with and have them enjoy our time together too. It’s so short now and going so fast. I don’t want any of us to lose a single minute that should be enjoyed with one another.

But I will enjoy my last three weeks carrying my son. I will memorize every moment I can and remember the three beautiful babies I have carried before him. Remember how much they each have meant to me and how much I enjoyed giving life to their beautiful souls.

I’m so thankful to have been blessed by God so many times. So thankful to have two girls and now two boys to raise and love. I hope Jackson is very much like his siblings, all of them. That he shares their sweetness, kindness and love. I know they cannot wait to share it all with him, to love on him and care for him just as they have each other over the years.

We are patiently enjoying your last days inside Jackson and anticipating your impending arrival everyday. Such a blessing you are to us, our littlest angel. We all love you always. <3 p="p">

Still We are Busy! {Thoughts from Me}

August 5, 2011 by Dana

The past few days have continously been busy for me. One day spent planning and seemingly getting no where. The next two spent cleaning out the girls’ bedroom. It’s a major job that needed doing but it’s left me little time for anything else. Add on top of that an unexpected night out with friends, watching them ride some of the craziest amuzement rides in Myrtle Beach. All equals one tired me.

The kids, of course, are LOVING having their MaMa living nearby and having her here is helping me to get a lot of necessary things done. Between the two of us, Laycie hasn’t been able to get away with much. She spends most of her time following MaMa around which is allowing me to get many things done I don’t normally get to. The other kids come back and forth between our houses, playing and enjoying the best of both worlds: home and Grandma’s to visit. Mom is simply enjoying having a house again, as well as her babies to love on, though she greatly misses my nephews and really wants to see my neice.

This weekend will be spent, hopefully painting trim work in the girls’ bedroom, as well as working more on the reorganization in there. I’m praying to be selected for a recent release of a review which would be perfect for all of the kids to play with in the girls’ bedroom but I’m not giving details to that one yet. Just keeping my fingers crossed, as it comes just a few moments after mentioning the “need” of one in there today.

Tonight, I will be printing out some pages for my home and school management notebook. I really need the organization that such a notebook provides and haven’t taken time to complete any binder I have began in the past. I’m hoping to change that this year. I also need to work on reading through some of the things I need to review soon. I am enjoying the opportunities provided so far.

Well that’s all that we are up to at this time. Just simply staying busy but hopefully it will all come together for us very very soon.

Change Change Change

June 9, 2010 by Dana

This week has brought about much change in our lives. I know I keep talking about change in all of my posts lately but this week really begins it all.

What is change? Coins that you get back from a dollar bill? No, not this change. Change is a new season in life. A new beginning and also an ending to the old ways. Change is not always welcome but it usually turns out to be for the best.

My change comes on the official ending of a bad relationship and the beginning and continuous of a new one. My change comes out of choice, a choice to no longer be who I was but to become who I was meant to be. My change also comes out of my need to do what God wishes for my life, following His divine guidance into where and what He wishes me to be.

So my biggest questions have been where to begin and what next? My Mom is on her way to Florida to be settled with my brother’s family, leaving me not having to worry about her for now. I’m settled in my new home, though I have much to do inside it still. So where to begin next and what to do?

First, each day I have been taking time to pray to the Lord and to read my daily devotional from https://www.proverbs31.org/. I find much inspiration in these devotionals and sometimes I read two because I enjoy them so much.

Right now, I have much to go through, get rid of and put away in our home. I also need to set up our school schedule again, which in light of MaMa’s visit, has fallen to the wayside. But admist the chaos school cannot be completed, so the first step is managing and containing the clutter obtained in the past few months and a lifetime of memories which should have departed long ago.

Now, I am by far no housekeeper (though it is one of my legal jobs). I can keep a house for you, your sister, Mom, friend but I have a terrible time managing my own home. It always ends in disaster for me, a cluttered mess. This is something I truly want to overcome. And that is one of my recent life goals: to learn to manage my home, time and children’s lives better, thus managing my own life better.

So I’m on a search for bettering myself and my home skills while connecting ever more towards my Heavenly Father. I’m following His path, His guidance… and right now He’s telling me the past is past and it’s time to get started. Wish me luck!