Luv'N Lambert Life

Mental Health, Homeschooling, Epilepsy and More

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Happy Birthday to My Princess

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Eight years ago today, I gave birth to my first little girl.  I can remember it like it was yesterday.

Emmalee was born through a scheduled c-section.  I arrived at the hospital around 5:30am on February 17, 2003.  I was prepped and I remember going into labor not long before it was time for the c-section.  Around 8am I was wheeled back to the OR. 
Her delivery began normal and quickly turned into an emergency because my spinal block did not take like it was supposed to.  In fact, I was well awake and felt the entire delivery from the searing pain of the first cut to the tugging pain of being sewn up.  But it was all worth it.  I watched in the big metallic overhead light as they pulled my beautiful little Princess from beneath my heart.  I heard her sweet cry as they brought her for me to see.  I knew the moment I saw her, she was my Emmalee.  I heard her sweet cries as the anethesia quickly made me drift off to sleep.  I missed out on those things with her brother’s delivery 2 years and 2 months before.  I cherish every moment of the memories I have of my sweet girl’s birth. 

I remember the first time I was able to hold her close to me, looking into her beautiful blue eyes.  Later they would change to the prettiest brown eyes I’ve ever been blessed to know.  I kissed her, counted her fingers and toes.  I laid her into my arms and kept her there for as long as I could. 

Her big brother and her cousin were amazed by her.  They thought she was the prettiest baby and couldn’t wait to play with her.  They loved her from the moment she was born.  She quickly became her brother’s best friend, a bond that still hasn’t been broken. 

I look back and I wonder where the time has gone.  My baby girl is now 8 and I can hardly believe it.  In 10 short years she will be grown, ready to start a life of her own.  I want to cherish those years, to suck every speck of life and love out of them before that time comes.  I want to cherish the sweet girl, who’s faith in God and love of life, has given me so much strength these past 8 years.

She is my artist, my faithful one, my strength, my heart.  She is my Princessa.  The love I have for her cannot be explained.  She amazes me daily.  She’s my stubborn child, but her strengths, her wit, her amazing curiousity and faith far outweigh her stubborness.  God blessed me the day she was born, as much as he did the day her brother and her sister were born.  He blessed me with a Love like none I’ve ever known.  The love of a Mother to a Princess and a Princess for her Momma.

Happy 8th Birthday to my sweet Princess Emmalee.  Momma loves you, always and forever, my dear girl. <3

A Lot of Thinking {Thoughts from Me}

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Lately, as I’ve been cleaning, I have been doing a LOT of thinking.  Thinking about life and my wonderful children, God’s many blessings to me, where I’ve been and where I want to go.  Thinking about how far I have come in my life and about all it’s various changes.  They say you can not see God’s hand while He’s working.  It’s only when looking back that you truly see He was there all the time.

As I was redoing the boy’s room, unpacking my son’s various belongings and putting them in their proper places, many memories came back to me.  I found the stuffed dog that my daughter recently pointed out was with me in the hospital through both hers and my sons births.  Winston’s first birthday candle, reminding me of him falling asleep while eating his cake with his hands by his side (yes I’m talking face-first! LOL)  So many memories we have made over the years.
It’s hard to believe how far I have come in my life.  11 years ago I was preparing to marry a man I knew was wrong for me.  When we are young we think we know it all, despite fair warnings from all those we love.  I’m thankful for that mistake, since it lead to the birth of my two oldest babies and I could not imagine life without those two to keep me going. 
Three years ago, I met my ex-fiance and once again thought things were perfect though I knew better.  Sometimes it takes a huge mistake to make you grow up, but from that bad experience came my beautiful Laycie, and for that I am also thankful.
God was with me all along.  He was leading me forward and my children, too, as they came into the world.  He has given me such gorgeous and smart children.  He lead me to homeschool them, to teach them to be strong and semi-independant, and most of all loving, even when they are testing one another.  For that I am also thankful.  My babies are the best in my book.
I look back, I see how different I am from that girl who walked acrossed her parents backyard almost 11 years ago, the one who thought she knew it all.  I now know just how niave and childish I was.  Somedays she peaks through but now she’s an older and wiser girl, who cherishes her days with her little loves, their sweet smells, their joyous laughter.  I know it won’t last long. 
In 10 years, my son will be a grown man, living his own life.  That thought terrifies me at time, brings tears into my heart and my eyes like nothing else can.  I pray he is all that God intended for him to be.  Two years after that my girl will be old enough to go off on her own too and I will miss her sweet songs and strong personality desperately.  I will have only memories of my sweet babies to cherish.  This is something I do not look forward to but I know I cannot prevent.  I pray for them daily and I know, I KNOW God will lead and guide them just as He has done for me. 
I’m in a new life now.  I’m cherishing the years I have left with those beautiful babies and I realize the ones I’ve let past can never return.  I look forward to my days with them, listening to their stories, their laughter and even their arguing.  I look forward to growing with them, watching them learn and enjoy their own lives.  I’m thankful to be able to educate them at home, to teach them more than just independant studies but also teach them Life’s many lessons in our own home.  I get the good moments and the bad but most of all I get more memories to carry me on than I could ever feel blessed to ask for.
At this moment, this is the happiest I can remember feeling since I was a child, for my three gorgeous loves are the true meaning of Life and they truly are gifts straight from Heaven of which I can never be thankful enough.

Thank God It’s Monday {Thoughts from Me}

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Ahh, Mondays.  They get a bad wrap every week.  The beginning of the work week.  Start of hard labor.  First day after a relaxing weekend. 
Over time people have come to dread even hearing the word Monday.  They cringe when they even hear the word.
I’ve decided to give Monday back it’s greatness or rather it’s gratefulness by Thanking God It’s Monday.
Thank God It’s Monday…
Thank God for beautiful smiles.
Thank God for soft, giggles after a tickle session.
Thank God for ABC’s and 123’s, repeated over and over again.
Thank God for eating Basgetti and Smarshmellows when we get the urge.
Thank God for all the Mac N Cheese.
Thank God for wiggling toes and this Little Piggy who went to a market.
And Thank God for the chance to love, to live and to laugh every day…
Including Mondays.

What do you Thank God and Monday for?

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