finding god | Luv'N Lambert Life

Every year I make a post about what I want to change. Heck, every few months I make that post. Yet I never seem to make the changes happen. I go through the start of the process, but I can’t seem to make it to the awaited result.

I’ve read a million posts, thoughts, books about making changes in life, home, homeschooling and myself. I take away so much from these wonderful things yet never seem to put them into action. I join groups online just to put the things I learn into action and still I don’t. I’m a serious procrastinator and to be honest, I’m not at all sure how to change that. I want to but I simply don’t know how.

Some would say I’m fairly lazy, yet when I work on something I bust my butt at it so how can I truly be considered lazy? I consider myself organizationally challenged and a bit OCD in some ways. The two don’t work well together at all. Add in the fact I’m a procrastinating Gemini and oh boy, what a MESS!

Still I know there is some way I can overcome all of my personal challenges to have the life, the home and to become the person I truly wish to be. I know with God’s help, with His Love and Guidance I can overcome any issue. I place my faith and hope into His gracious hands daily as I walk this path to find my way in the life He has blessed me with.

I struggle to find my way but I know these are the things I want to be in life: A loving wife, a gracious Mother, an honest and faithful friend, a strong and faithfilled servant to Him. So bettering myself in Christ, in Love, in Knowledge are always goals that I strive daily to reach. I feel I fail at them most days, but I know He guides me through and everyday I become a bit closer to each goal. One day I will meet them and exceed who I wish to become to reach what He wished for me to be all along. Until then I will move forward in life and slowly work at the things I need to work towards and change about me day by day, minute by minute and hopefully I will enjoy every single minute of Lambert Life along the way.

It seems I always have 1000 things running through my head these days that I want to post about and yet I never do. I come to the blog, I open a post and yet I shut my mouth so to speak. Me at a loss of words! Can you imagine?

I try my best to avoid drama and it seems to be drawn to me like a bear to honey. It finds me, searches me out no matter how much I try to hide from it. I find that to be a huge reason behind my lack of inspiration in writing and sharing with others online lately. I’m sick of being drawn into the midst of some small drama that turns huge for no reason and I surely do not want that monster to find my sweet little blog!!

But I feel the need to write, to share, to talk, to guide, to let God speak through me as much as I’m able and to share my thoughts with others. Many of us feel that way, I know. I read wise words from my lovely friends and those who inspire us every day. I see God in these works and I want to see God in my work too.

Lately, I’ve been persuing my photography career thanks to my dear friends who have greatly encouraged me (you know who you are). It’s been time consuming and enjoyable all at the same time. I see God in their shoves and God in my work. Now I find myself wanting to see God in my words too. Is he there? Can I easily find him?

I personally don’t see it often enough. I feel the weight of the Devil on my thoughts and I try to avoid him like the plague. I feel depressed and discouraged, left abandoned and wanting for more from this life of mine. God can overcome all of this, I know. I have that faith in him. That mustard seed of faith that I must always keep just to perservere and tredge ahead in my personal world.

Tonite, I feel God calling me to do more. I feel him saying Grow, Blossom and share my love with others. Share your talents as I provide them, he says to me and so I am doing my best to do that both in my words and my photography. I am finding peace in my thoughts, peace in my words. Much needed peace that I don’t want to forget and can’t always find. By seeking Him I can find them though. And that is what I need to do more of.

I’m surely not alone in this need, to find peace and love and God all at once together. And in God is where I will find the three. Only in God. I know this. You know this. It’s what each of us seeks daily. His guidance and His Love.

There is so much more to do, to say, to be and yet His Love is enough. More than enough ever it will be.

Goodnight all.

Dana <3