Luv'N Lambert Life

A blog about living with Epilepsy, IBHS, Homeschooling and so much more

hysterectomy

Health Update: July 2017 {Severe Anemia Awareness}

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This week has been hard.  The last month really.  My medicine is no longer controlling my uterine bleeding like it had been and now I am exhausted again.

I emailed my doctor’s office last night to set up a new appointment with the doctor so I can go ahead and schedule my hysterectomy.  I wasn’t ready before but now I am.  I want my life back and energy back.  I want to enjoy my days again.

So right now, I’m low in energy.  I’m eating tons of spinach and other iron rich foods to keep my blood volume up but it’s only doing so much since my body doesn’t absorb iron like it should.  I’m also trying to take a multivitamin daily.

I’m not sure when surgery will be schedule but I’m hoping by August 16th so I can be up and moving by Jack’s birthday.  We will see.

Until later on… I’m off to take a nap…
Dana

One Week To Go {Severe Anemia Awareness}

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One week to go…

In one week my life will change.  My ability to go forth and multiply will be gone.  My heart will never be the same.

I’m trying to remain positive but it’s hard.  Monday we go for my ultrasound to see what’s causing my bleeding.  My doctor feels uterine fibroids but won’t know for sure until the ultrasound.

Having my children has been a blessing.  I never imagined I would be sitting here waiting for my uterus to be removed.  I never imagined there would not be a chance to have “just one more” baby.

I know I’m blessed to have four beautiful children.  I know many women aren’t as lucky as me.  Still this is part of me that I don’t wish to let go of.  And yet, I know to continue to enjoy my life with my children and family, I need to have this hysterectomy done.

I look forward to playing with my kids, to camping, to learning, to enjoying our day to day life again.  I look forward to not having to worry about having extra clothes “just in case” or how much blood am I going to lose before it stops again.  I look forward to not having worry, to just being able to enjoy life and worry about the little things, like paying a bill or buying the kids that new movie they’ve been wanting to see.

In one week, I will be coming out of surgery and stuck in a bed for 12 hours or more.  I will no longer have my uterus and may not have a cervix or ovaries depending on what they find.  In one week, I will barely be able to move from the pain of losing an important part of my body.  In one week, my life will be forever changed, hopefully for the better.

The Answer From The GYN {Severe Anemia Awareness}

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Monday I saw the GYN.

It feels like it was a month ago but it’s only been a few days.  The visit didn’t take long.  He checked my blood work.  He checked me.  And we talked.

He asked was I completely done having children.  My answer was yes because I had my tubal.  He asked me very seriously was I finished, without considering the tubal, was I done.  That was a hard question for me to answer.

He said my uterus is slightly enlarged but not terribly.  He said I had two options to stop the bleeding: medicine or a hysterectomy but in the end it would probably be the later for both options.  In his opinion it is best to go ahead and take out my uterus.

I’m 37 years old.  Except for Epilepsy, I’ve been fairly healthy up until now.  I hardly get sick.  I make educated health choices.

I’m 37 years old and my uterus is giving out on me.  My days of having babies is ending and very soon.  My head says this is the right thing to do for my health.  My heart is broken.

I’ve had 4 babies and I’ve loved every moment with them.  I’ve loved carrying them within my womb.  I never once thought the option would no longer be there.  I’ve never once thought I’d be without something so important as this.

But here I am.  And my only option is to let it go, to say goodbye to this beautiful part of me that God has allowed me to bring forth my most beautiful gifts in.  To let go of it for my health so I can live for my children.

My heart says, “just one more”.  But then isn’t that time already passed.  I said goodbye to babies when I had my tubal.

I regret that.  I regret giving up the ability to have children.  I regret not allowing myself to have that one more baby.  But then that one more would have led into another and maybe another.  I don’t think the desire to have more children will ever leave my heart.

And I’m thankful.  I know so many women never get their sweet gifts from God.  He blessed me with 4 and two I’ll only know when I get to Heaven.  I’m thankful for that.  For the opportunity to love His children, my children in this lifetime.

So here I am, making this huge choice for my health, with my heart in pieces and hoping it’s the right answer for me.  I need to be healthy to enjoy the time I have with my children during their youth as that’s quickly passing every day.  I want to be there to see them grow and prosper.

My surgery date is March 29 with some pre-op stuff on March 27.  I picked the closest date so I could just get it over with.  I’m hoping that it’s quick and easy for me with no complications.  I’m hoping it’s like those 4 c-sections in comparison to pain.  I won’t know until I get there, but I pray for quick healing and ease in moving forward.

For now this is where we are at.

God bless,

Dana